On New Year’s Day, my girlfriend Diane, her daughter Nicole and I enjoyed dim sum at the House of Hong in Seattle’s International District. At the end of the meal, our waitress brought us the check and fortune cookies. Mine said, “You will make a change for the better”. I smiled and thought, great timing.
2012 brought change, some good, some not so much. After 13 years, KCTS 9 Connects, a show I helped to create, produce and host was cancelled. It was not a surprise. I knew it would happen. It actually ended the way I had hoped it would end. It was going to be cancelled in September, 2011, but KCTS management agreed to continue the show through the 2012 elections. Now we are moving on and trying to determine what public affairs coverage to produce in 2013.
Change is never easy. Sometimes I have handled it well, sometimes not. I actually don’t mind change. It depends how it comes about and if the people driving the change are honest and respectful in the way they carry it out. It also helps if there is a plan to move forward. It is an adjustment and it can take time to get comfortable. Sometimes it is best to just move on.
Maybe it is age, but I am looking at change differently these days. I am trying to not let it freak me out. It seems the best way to cope is to give it some time, size it up and then be proactive, not reactive, in handling it.
I am not big on making New Year’s resolutions mainly because I fail to follow through, but this year will be different. Just before Christmas, I had a stress test and the results came back abnormal. On Martin Luther King Day, I will head to Swedish Medical Center for an angiogram to determine why a part of my heart is not working the way it should be. If there is a blockage, I may need to have a stent inserted to open it up.
Even if I do not need a stent, I know that I will have to make some big health related changes this year. Age and the genes I inherited from my mother have given me a wake-up call. I need to eat better, drink less or not at all, and exercise more. It will be positive change and I think it will help to make the rest of life better.
Going forward, the fortune cookie message will be tucked into my wallet. Whenever I think that change sucks, I will pull it out to remind myself that change can be good if I choose to make it that way and that is what I am planning to do in 2013 and beyond.
Having health issues (or watching your loved ones go through them) is a very challenging setting for embracing change – however, not only is it courageous, it is so rich in rewards. I especially applaud your courage to share your perspective while this stuff is happening.
With my own health issues, I suddenly found that I could no longer have “normal’ interactions with folks in my life. Normal was no longer a luxury – but thank goodness! Either the issue at hand was ignored because it was too uncomfortable or it became the only latitude where I was expected to be found (either way, it was exhausting).
But there have been some significant gifts that have happened along the way too. There were some folks in my life, who I didn’t even know very well in the beginning, who ended up being major sources of friendship and support. Often I would learn that they also had some major source of change in their own lives. I’ve met other people going through similar journeys too, which has been so illuminating and has resulted in some incredible friendships. The landscape I live in is dramatically different. The initial sadness gave way to acceptance, which is now growing into love. The ability to be “in the moment” with yourself and with others, no matter how inelegant it can feel, is HUGE. I am learning how to love on a whole new, better level.
Please forgive my lengthy post. Thank you so much for sharing this step in your journey, Enrique. You are in my thoughts and I salute you. Happy New Year!
The most important thing in life is to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF – IF YOU ARE NOT HEALTHY then you can’t be there for the second most important thing in life – FAMILY. It was a wakeup call Enrique (you will always be Henry to me little brother). I am hoping and praying you are going to make positive changes that will enrich your life all the way around. It is YOUR turn (and time) to be happy, to LEAVE the past behind and get on with life. We only have one go around and you need to make it count. You are a very loving, caring, gifted and talented man and you deserve to be truly happy. But that will only come if you can leave the past behind you and move forward in EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE (I think you know what I’m trying to say). Lots of people love and care about you and only want the best for you – YOU DESERVE IT! Please keep me updated on your health and let me know how the tests turn out. I will be praying for you. AND GOOD LUCK WITH DIANE – if she’s special, then go for the gusto my friend. You need someone special to move on. love you, bren
Enrique, I am sorry to hear about your heart and my thought are with you. I like your approach to change and as you continue to inspire others, your work will come to fruition.